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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30146502">The Jerk Next Door</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/niteryde/pseuds/niteryde'>niteryde</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dragon Ball</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Awesome Bulma Briefs, Banter For Days, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, F/M, Humor, Romance, Romantic Comedy, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Vegeta being Vegeta (Dragon Ball), lighthearted romcom, romcom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:40:41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>14,898</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30146502</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/niteryde/pseuds/niteryde</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Bulma has several serious problems with her new neighbor in the apartment next door. First, he is the rudest, most condescending jerk she’s ever had the displeasure of meeting. Second, living next to him has now become psychological warfare. Third and most annoying of all, he’s smoking hot, which is awfully distracting when you're trying to hate somebody.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bulma Briefs/Vegeta</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>197</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>195</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Archnemesis</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A/N: Everyone is human here. This is meant to be a silly lighthearted kind of thing, like a romcom fic. That said, humor is pretty subjective so if you enjoy, please leave some love to let me know! Appreciate y'all!</p><p>I don't own anything nor do I make any profit, I just love these characters and love to write :) hope you enjoy.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In hindsight, this was really all Goku's fault.</p><p>Bulma had been living her best life up until a few weeks ago. Her relationship with Yamcha was the best it had been in months – in fact, she was sure he would be proposing soon. Her job was firing on all cylinders as she worked hard to make a name for herself outside of her father's company, crushing every project sent her way like the amazing genius that she was. At the rate she was going, she'd be running the damn place in no time. Her social life was great, especially with her best friend Goku living in the apartment next door, which naturally had his girlfriend Chi-Chi visiting often. All was right with the world, the stars were aligned, and she was <em>happy</em>.</p><p>Then Goku – the <em>jerk –</em> had decided to move out so he could go live with his girlfriend. That had been the first wrench thrown into her perfect life, losing him as a neighbor and also unconsciously reminding her that Yamcha was opposed to them living together right now.</p><p>But this was not Goku's ultimate sin. No, the real catastrophe had been when Goku, in all of his wisdom, had decided to sublet his apartment for the remainder of his lease to "one of his best friends", a fellow security guard named Vegeta. Bulma questioned the friendship because she had never heard of the man until Goku sprang this bullshit on her one awful day. She thought she had known all his friends, but apparently Goku had coworkers that mingled in their own social circles. That was well and good, as she assumed she would like this new friend.</p><p>And then Vegeta had moved in next door, taking over Goku's apartment, and everything had gone to shit.</p><p>Firstly, because Goku (and by extension Chi-Chi) were no longer around all the time to easily come over and spend time with her while Yamcha was away with his baseball team, which he often was.</p><p>But secondly, her new neighbor was a complete asshole. Grade A, certified, 100%, bonafide asshole.</p><p>Oh, Bulma had tried to be civil at first. She was a model citizen, and prided herself on being amazing in all areas of her life, to include being a fantastic friend and an even better neighbor. She was thoughtful, she was considerate, she was just the fucking best and everyone was privileged to know her. So when Vegeta had settled into the apartment next door with all his belongings, she had given him a few days to unpack and get situated, and then had come over to introduce herself. She had even baked him a small chocolate cake, with sprinkles and a "hello neighbor!" in wonderful icing penmanship.</p><p>And he had ignored her completely. At first she thought he wasn't home, so she had left the chocolate cake right outside his door, covered up and protected in tupperware, along with a welcome note. Bulma then happily went back to her apartment and closed the door behind her – only to hear Vegeta quickly open and close the door to his own apartment. Bulma had poked her head back out, saw that the chocolate cake was gone, and scowled. She rationalized it away, giving him the benefit of the doubt due to his friendship with Goku – maybe he was just tired and wasn't up for company. But when she had crossed paths with him the next day on the stairs, he hadn't even looked at her, much less bothered to thank her for the cake.</p><p>The bastard had been on her shit list ever since.</p><p>But then things had gone from bad to worse when the laundry war had started.</p><p>Bulma was a creature of habit. She was also a creature of procrastination. Moving away from her family's compound, spreading her wings to make her name on her own merit in the technical industry without her father's company to fall back on, had all been well and good; she was well aware though that she had grown up wealthy, privileged, and somewhat spoiled.</p><p>Okay, a lot spoiled. The day-to-day chores were a grind that she was still not entirely used to doing on her own, and thus were always put off to the last possible moment. She kept up well enough with the laundry, but she always did it Sunday night in preparation for the work week, when no one else in the apartment building used the shared washing and drying machines.</p><p>Until Asshole Neighbor moved in, that is. Apparently, Vegeta was also a creature of habit, and his preferred laundry day and time was also Sunday night, roughly around 11pm – same as her. The apartment complex was nice and simple, in a safe neighborhood, but there were only two washing machines and two drying machines in each building. These numbers were usually fine as there were only 6 apartments in the building, two on each floor, but one washing machine and one dryer had not worked in the two years Bulma had lived in her top floor apartment. Management was lazy, and though she had the money to spring for the repairs, the machines had never posed a problem before. So why bother?</p><p>The first week after Vegeta had moved in, he had beaten her to the laundry room, baffling her endlessly – was he purposely annoying her? Who else did laundry on Sunday nights except <em>her? </em>Then to rub salt in the wounds, he had chosen a drying cycle for <em>THREE HOURS, </em>thus making her stay up into the wee hours of the morning to get her laundry done afterwards (for she was not a savage who would interrupt someone else's drying cycle). Bulma had been beyond annoyed, but she had taken her licks and learned a lesson.</p><p>The following week, she had gone down to the laundry room half an hour earlier than usual at 10:30pm, and was pleased that she had gotten to the room first. She threw in her clothes for the wash, and then had gone back upstairs to continue watching her sitcom on TV. Too quickly, Bulma forgot about the laundry – when she remembered, it was already past midnight.</p><p>She then went back downstairs to throw her clothes into the dryer, only to discover the first act of war that Vegeta had launched against her. The asshole had taken her wet clothes out of the washing machine and left them on a side table, still drenched, so he could wash his own clothes. His were now tumbling in the dryer while hers sat in wet misery, the colors probably already smearing.</p><p>Though the dryer was not designed to stop mid-cycle, she was a genius, and this was fucking war now. Bulma had crawled behind the dryer and found the right connections to force the cycle to stop, and then had thrown Vegeta's mostly-wet clothes on the table next to hers. Then she put her poor clothes in and ran the dryer again from the beginning, and gone back to her apartment.</p><p>This time, Vegeta didn't ignore her the next day when they walked past each other, him coming upstairs from his morning run and her going downstairs to work. If looks could kill, they both would have needed eulogies as they stared each other down. No words were spoken, just silent and simmering anger, for the laundry war had begun and it would be waged again the following Sunday night.</p><p>Though she had to give it to him. Vegeta ran religiously in the mornings, and that morning he was in a tank top that was soaked in his sweat, and fucking hell, those tanned, muscled arms of his were almost worth her moving her laundry time to a different time. <em>Almost. </em>Sexy arms or no, she would not be bullied out of her Sunday laundry nights.</p><p>"<em>How </em>is Goku friends with that guy?" Bulma groaned to Chi-Chi over a hot cup of coffee the following Sunday at the café near Goku and Chi-Chi's apartment. "I baked him a cake – I BAKED IT, Chi-Chi! And he didn't even have the decency to say thanks, hell, he hasn't even given me back the tupperware that held the cake!"</p><p>Chi-Chi just laughed, adding more sugar into her cappuccino. "Yeah, that's Vegeta for you."</p><p>"And then don't EVEN get me started on the laundry thing."</p><p>"You could always do your laundry earlier?"</p><p>"No! Why should I? I've been doing it Sunday nights since I moved in, I have dibs. I won't give in to that jerk."</p><p>Chi-Chi shook her head, fighting a smile as she raised her hot cup up to her lips. "Well, I'll be sure to tell Goku that Vegeta is getting along great with his new neighbors."</p><p>"I'm pretty sure I'm the only one who has tried talking to him, he doesn't make himself very approachable," Bulma muttered, sipping her coffee. She paused before scowling as she added, "Also, he's always walking around in a tank top," she said in annoyance.</p><p>"What's the issue with that?"</p><p>"Those arms are the issue!" Bulma growled. "He's showing off, forcing me to look at him. There are even mornings when I've glimpsed him leave shirtless for his runs."</p><p>Chi-Chi laughed. "Or it's summer time? I'm not the guy's biggest fan, but it's pretty hot outside these days."</p><p>"Don't defend him, Chi."</p><p>"I will admit, he's not terrible looking. Goku's coworkers all keep in great shape. Also, I don't know him very well, Goku usually went to his place to visit him or they would go to the gym together. Goku did say though that he thought you would get along well with Vegeta if you got to know him."</p><p>"I love Goku, but he's got me mistaken for someone else if he thinks I'm getting along with that jerk next door."</p><p>"Well, at least Yamcha is in town from what Goku was telling me, so at least he can distract you in a good way!"</p><p>At her boyfriend's name, Bulma perked up a bit. "Yes, my birthday is this week, and I'm sure he's planning something amazing!" she dreamily said, finally forgetting about her surly neighbor. "I'm also sure he's going to propose soon. This is the longest we've gone without a fight. I think we have finally settled down with each other…took long enough, ten whole years."</p><p>"A proposal soon huh?" Chi-Chi asked excitedly. "I'm feeling the same way about Goku. Maybe we'll be engaged at the same time!"</p><p>"Yeah, then we can have a joint bachelorette party!" Bulma said with a wide smile. She looked down when her phone buzzed, taking it out for a quick glance. "Ah, I have to run, Yamcha's done with the gym and he's coming over. We have to spend good time together before he leaves in a few days for his next out-of-town games."</p><p>"Have fun!"</p>
<hr/><p>Bulma was giggling later that night, her boyfriend rolling on top of her so he wouldn't break contact with her skin as he continued kissing her along her collarbone and down to her breasts. Bulma leaned her head back to give him better access, a look of content on her face as he worshipped her like the goddess she was. The sex between them wasn't rock-your-world quality, but sex was like pizza – even when it wasn't great, it was still good, and she was just fine with Yamcha in the same way one could avoid starving by eating above-average pizza. Though she did wish he was a little more assertive and took charge more often, she figured there was more than enough time ahead of them in their lives to improve things in the bedroom.</p><p>She licked her lips a little when she felt Yamcha's erection against her thigh – now things were finally getting <em>good</em> – when her eyes drifted to the clock next to her bed. Her blue eyes widened as she abruptly sat up, damn near sending Yamcha tumbling backwards off the bed entirely.</p><p>"Bulma?" he asked in confusion, sitting up on the bed. His confusion became bewilderment as Bulma got up and quickly slipped on a bra, then the nearest shirt she could find. Getting dressed fast was easy for her after all, as her pants hadn't even been removed yet. "What's wrong?"</p><p>"It's 10pm!" Bulma shot back, with so much assertiveness that she may as well have been answering what the meaning of life was. Yamcha couldn't get another word out before she snatched up her hamper filled with dirty clothes, threw some socks on the floor in there, and then vanished from the bedroom. A few seconds later, and he heard the door to her apartment open and close.</p><p>Bulma marched down the stairs with her hamper like she was going to war, before finally coming down to the ground level. She swiped her fob quickly and entered the laundry room, eager to win the battle this week.</p><p>She was greeted by the sight of her archnemesis sitting on the drying machine that was already running, arms crossed over his chest. Vegeta's dark eyes were challenging as they settled on her, making her huff with annoyance. This was the first time she was getting a really good look at him, not just in passing, and she was annoyed that the bastard had the audacity to be so attractive. Why were the assholes always the super hot ones? At least he was in a long sleeved shirt this time, covering up those arms for once. Still, that jawline and that form-fitting v-neck shirt had her feeling some kind of way.</p><p>"This machine is already in use," he sneered. Bulma felt her annoyance worsen when she finally heard his voice for the first time. It was rough and gravelly – if there was a higher power, then they had a shit sense of humor to give an asshole like him such a nice, manly voice.</p><p>She dropped her hamper, and lifted her chin. "Oh, so you have a voice after all. You should have used it to let me know that my clothes were done washing last week, instead of taking them out while they were still wet."</p><p>Vegeta shrugged in a way that showed he couldn't care less, making her blood pressure rise. "I needed mine done. I waited over an hour for you to come take them out of the washing machine, and when you didn't, I had no choice but to take action. I didn't even know they were <em>your</em> clothes, though I guessed as much by the obnoxious shirts with your name on it. You have no one to blame for this situation but yourself."</p><p>"I will have you know that I've been doing laundry at this time on Sunday nights since I moved here!" Bulma yelled in frustration. "So find another time! Sunday night is mine!"</p><p>Vegeta scoffed, unfazed. "Oh? Is there a schedule I wasn't informed of?"</p><p>"You're new here, you don't get to just walk in and be king of the laundry room!"</p><p>"You aren't very welcoming, are you?"</p><p>Bulma gasped, eyes widening from his audacity. "Oh no you don't! You lost the moral high ground, buddy, when you took out my wet clothes and <em>left them on the table</em>, like you were raised in the fucking jungle! After I baked you a welcome cake too!"</p><p>"The cake was from you?" Vegeta asked, raising an eyebrow. It made him look even more attractive, which just pissed her off more. Why was the universe so fucking unfair? Her boyfriend was waiting for her in her apartment, naked and ready to roll, and instead of being with him, she was here in the laundry room with her jackass of a neighbor. Not only that, but he was effortlessly pleasing to her dumb primal woman brain. Fucking hell, she hated Goku for this. "There was no name on the note, so how was I supposed to know?" Vegeta added, scowling at her.</p><p>Bulma huffed, annoyed and embarrassed that she had forgotten such a simple detail. "Well, maybe I'll forgive you then for not bringing me back my tupperware, especially after I gave you a kickass, delicious cake."</p><p>"Well, the cake wasn't complete shit, though it was a bit too sweet," he deadpanned.</p><p>Bulma looked offended, practically glowering at him when it was clear that was all he was going to say. Not a thanks in sight. Typical.</p><p>"<em>You're welcome</em>, jerk. I want my tupperware back, and I want you to find another time to wash your clothes, because this time is mine."</p><p>"Sorry, this is the best time for me," he explained with a shrug. "I read over the lease carefully, and the laundry room is first-come, first-serve. You don't own the building, much less the complex, so I don't owe you any explanation."</p><p><em>I'm going to buy this whole fucking apartment complex just to show this asshole who's boss, </em>Bulma briefly thought, her blue eyes blazing. She refrained from doing so, though it took effort. Self-control was a lifelong pursuit for her, but she was trying not to buy her way out of every problem in life. Oh, but it would be so delicious to rid the arrogance right off her turd neighbor's face.</p><p>As though he could read her mind, the smug look on Vegeta's face just grew, and Bulma felt the urge to punch something. Her eyes lowered down to the drying machine he was sitting on – the cycle had just barely started, and of course, was set for a three hour cycle.</p><p>"Three hours is fucking ridiculous for a drying machine," she informed him.</p><p>Another maddening shrug. "I didn't design it."</p><p>"You also didn't have to choose the three hour drying cycle! There is an option for one hour too!"</p><p>"I like my clothes hot," he said, his tone condescending.</p><p>Bulma snatched up her hamper, shooting him one last glare. "I don't know how Goku puts up with you, but this isn't over," she tossed over her shoulder as she strolled out of the room. The door was closing and she was already stomping back upstairs when she yelled out, "And I want my tupperware back!"</p><p>The door clicked shut, and Vegeta pulled out his cell phone while listening to her march back up the stairs. He texted Goku, scowling as he did.</p><p>
  <em>My new neighbor, your "friend", is a huge pain in the ass.</em>
</p><p>A couple minutes later, he got a ping back.</p><p>
  <em>Aw, Bulma is so great and nice! You'll love her once you get to know her :)</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She's spoiled as shit, entitled, and insufferable.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hehe, I'm sure you'll warm up to her!</em>
</p><p>Vegeta rolled his eyes over his friend's infuriating and eternal optimism, not bothering to respond to that. It was clear the woman couldn't stand him, but he was not going to lose any sleep over it. The feeling thus far was mutual after all, and petty as the laundry situation was, he was not going to give in. She could feel however she felt about that.</p><p>He wound up staying in the laundry room until the drying cycle was done – just to make sure she didn't pull any shit if he stepped away. However, when he went back upstairs and entered his apartment with his now dried (and folded) clean clothes, he felt a vein on his temple pulse when he heard rhythmic pounding. It seemed Bulma's boyfriend had her well occupied, and he rolled his eyes when he heard moans as soon as he entered his bedroom. Their apartments were mirror images of each other, which meant that his bedroom was right against Bulma's, much to his chagrin. With the thin walls, it was a fucking nightmare.</p><p>Fifteen minutes later, and Vegeta was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling as he heard the raunchy noises in the apartment next door. He put in some earbuds, playing some white noise on his cell phone, but still couldn't fully drown it out. Goku hadn't told him about this bullshit, but he had to find a way to deal with it; this location was perfect for him and he was saving lots of money by living there.</p><p>Plus, to move out would mean surrendering, and it would be a cold day in hell before he ever fucking surrendered, much less to his annoying ass neighbor. He frowned up at the ceiling, when an idea for how to make this stop occurred to him.</p><p>Reaching over to his nightstand, he picked up a pen and jotted down – <em>I know what a woman having an orgasm sounds like, and it doesn't sound like </em>that<em>, so I give your boyfriend a 4 out of 10 since you had to fake it.</em></p><p>Tearing the note off the notepad, Vegeta got up so he could go tape it on Bulma's door, making sure to leave the tupperware at her door too. After all, despite what she thought of him, he wasn't a <em>total</em> dick.</p><p>Thankfully (and unsurprisingly) the sex next door was over by the time he got back in bed. With everything quiet, he was soon falling asleep, with a small grin of satisfaction as he imagined how she'd respond to reading his note.</p><p>Moving into Goku's old apartment hadn't been what he imagined, but at least it wasn't boring.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Save Our Planet</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A/N: Thank you all so so much. I'm glad my humor isn't terrible LOL. Hope you enjoy.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bulma's day thus far was not looking promising. In fact, it was looking like total shit.</p><p>First, she had to wake up at the fucking crack of dawn to do her laundry before work, thanks to Neighbor Jackass. She had gotten all wrapped up in her sheets after sex with Yamcha (in which he had his orgasm and promptly fell asleep in her bed, leaving her unsatisfied – she should have known, right then and there, that the next day would be shit). While scrambling to turn off the alarm, she promptly fell out of bed, landing in a pathetic pile of sheets on the floor. Yamcha, the jerk, never stopped snoring the whole time.</p><p>Finally, once she had composed herself, she gathered up her laundry hamper to make a necessary run to the laundry room – if she hustled, she'd have clean clothes in time for work. Before she went downstairs, she put on pot of coffee, only to realize she was out of sugar. Bulma bit her lip hard so she wouldn't scream. It was 5 in the morning and way too early for this bullshit. Muttering to herself that she would have to make a Starbucks run before work, she stepped out of her apartment, holding her hamper close and thus completely missing the tupperware that had been left right in front of her door.</p><p>Until, that is, she tripped on it and nearly went flying forward down the stairs. Fortunately, she managed to fall to the side and avoid the stairs which were just a few feet in front of her apartment door. Her hamper had fallen in the chaos, and now some of her clothes were on the floor, some of her underwear on the stairs. The apartment building was clean, but people fucking <em>walked </em>there.</p><p>Bulma slowly stood up, seriously debating calling in sick because the day was looking like it hated her and the sun wasn't even up yet. It was then that she looked down and saw why she had tripped in the first place. Her tupperware was bent now and roughened up, how appropriate.</p><p>Something then caught the corner of her eye. The doors to the apartments were a dark green, and she saw a flash of white in her peripheral vision. Turning to her door, she saw a note taped there. Coming closer, she snatched it off the door and read it.</p><p>Moments later, her face burned a hot red.</p><p>Vegeta had been half dozing when he heard the banging on his door. His alarm had gone off just moments ago, but he had wanted to snooze a few extra minutes before he got up for his morning run. He snatched a pillow and pulled it over his head, initially planning to do nothing until the person went away, like he normally did when someone knocked on his door. Whoever it was this morning though was completely unrelenting, and he growled as he shoved his pillow off and got up out of bed.</p><p>Finally, after what felt like an eternity to Bulma, the door angrily opened and Vegeta appeared before her, fuming. Sure, he had been planning to get up within the next few minutes, but it was the principle of the thing. Vegeta sneered and opened his mouth to say something nasty, when the crumpled up note hit him square in the face, as hard as Bulma could possibly throw it. Vegeta blinked, staring at his neighbor in surprise.</p><p>"How <em>dare </em>you," Bulma seethed, her eyes blazing with rage…and suddenly itching to roam. Vegeta was only in his boxer briefs, his sculpted body on full display, his upswept hair disheveled from sleep. <em>Fuck</em>. She forced herself to keep eye contact, but damn, the primal woman brain was singing in delight over the sexy male body in front of her. "And can't you put on a shirt when you answer the door? Or at least some damn pants?" she demanded in frustration. How dare he use his body to distract her from the issue at hand!</p><p>Vegeta glared at her, nostrils flaring. "I was sleeping. It's 5 in the morning," he told her nastily. "What the hell do you want anyway?"</p><p>"I want you to NOT leave notes like that on my door, you rude, obnoxious, disrespectful JACKASS!"</p><p>Upon remembering his obscene note he had taped on her door, Vegeta's anger melted into something that was akin to amusement. He offered a maddening shrug which made Bulma's blood boil. Nonchalantly, he crossed his arms over his chest, leaning his shoulder against the doorframe.</p><p>"Maybe some of us around here want to get some sleep and not be forced to listen to shitty sex."</p><p>Bulma's face furiously blushed. She was wondering if she had watched enough true crime to kill this man, dispose of his body, and get away with it.</p><p>"My sex life is none of your business, but if you must know, my boyfriend is an AMAZING lover."</p><p>He cocked an eyebrow and smirked. "Oh? Is that why you faked an orgasm?"</p><p>Bulma's eyes widened over his audacity to not only write that down and put it on her door (thank goodness <em>she </em>had found it and not Yamcha), but to actually voice such an offensive statement out loud, to her face. Her hot blush spread almost to her ears from her growing rage, and also because the fucking jerk was right – okay, she <em>had </em>faked it, but it wasn't something she ALWAYS had to do. Yamcha was usually a considerate lover, but every once in a while, it just didn't click between them in bed, despite plenty of conversation about it. But that didn't make it her neighbor's business!</p><p>"Yeah, well at least I'm freaking getting some," she shot back the first words that came to mind. "Who would ever want to sleep with <em>you</em>?" she asked in disgust, eyeing him up and down as though he was beneath her. Which he was. But that body of his sure wasn't – she had thought his arms were amazing, but those abs, good lord; a girl could chip a tooth on them.</p><p>Vegeta grinned in amusement, the arrogance growing in his gaze from the way she looked at him, which was opposite to the words she spoke. "I'd rather be alone than settle for sex that's a 4 out of 10." He paused, and his grin spread almost maliciously. "Though when I take charge, it's always a 10 out of 10."</p><p>Bulma raised one finger up to his face so fast that he leaned back a little, scowling at her. "You…" she almost sputtered. "You are a <em>first-rate</em> asshole, and we are done, FOREVER. Don't EVER speak to me again!"</p><p>Vegeta scoffed. "You're the one that knocked on <em>my</em> door."</p><p>"Shut up!" she yelled, uncaring now who heard. She marched over to grab her hamper, then headed down the stairs, nearly falling as she angrily scooped up her fallen clothes. "And this is the last time I get up early to do laundry, Sunday nights are MINE!" she yelled back for good measure.</p><p>Vegeta rolled his eyes, and went back into his apartment, resisting the urge to slam the door.</p><hr/><p>Normal people had tempers. Bulma Briefs was not a normal person though, Bulma Briefs was a force of nature. Goku was used to it though, having grown up with her, he knew how she ticked. He knew that underneath all of that was a heart of gold, and a woman who would do anything for the people she loved.</p><p>Vegeta was also not a normal person (did he attract ANY normal friends? He would have to ponder that later with Chi-Chi). If Bulma was a hurricane, then Vegeta was a fucking tsunami. Goku had been friends with him now for quite a few years, very good friends despite the man's surly attitude and extremely rude behavior. He liked to think that because he liked both Bulma and Vegeta, that the arrangement with Vegeta subletting his apartment was going to work out for everyone; after all, if HE liked them both, then surely, they would like each other, right?</p><p>But Chi-Chi seemed to think otherwise. Bulma had called her and vented for twenty solid minutes about her new neighbor, and now Chi-Chi was concerned. She was convinced that Bulma and Vegeta were likely to kill each other one of these days if things kept going the way they were. <em>Maybe you can talk to Vegeta, and convince him to be nicer to Bulma, </em>she had suggested to him that morning. Goku had his doubts, but he was naked with Chi-Chi in bed when she had suggested this. Therefore, he had easily agreed.</p><p>Goku peered down at Vegeta, spotting him while Vegeta worked on his bench press after work. They were both security contractors, well trained in martial arts with 6 black belts between them, and were currently assigned to a law firm. The firm had the best gym either had ever seen, and they were allowed to use it after business hours, something they both readily took advantage of.</p><p>"So," Goku started as Vegeta slowly continued his reps. "How's it going in the new apartment?"</p><p>Vegeta glared at the upside down face of the man leaning over him, sweat covering his face. "It's perfect, minus the demon wench that lives next to me."</p><p>"You know, you ought to cut Bulma some slack. She did make you a cake to welcome you, and I heard you didn't even say thanks."</p><p>"Oh, you heard, did you?" Vegeta growled. He was trying to focus on his form, especially when he was lifting 300 pounds, but the conversation was annoying him. At least it was fueling him to get out a few more reps. "If you MUST know, I didn't realize she was the one who left it."</p><p>"Okay, but you know now?"</p><p>"Too late. She called me an asshole. She even crumpled a note and threw it in my face. I'm not giving in now, Kakarot," he swore, using Goku's legal name.</p><p>Vegeta slowly put the bar back up with Goku spotting him, and then sat up on the bench. He snatched up a towel and got up, moving over to return the favor while Goku laid down on the bench.</p><p>"Put 25 more on either side, will ya?" Goku asked, making Vegeta give him a dark glare before he did what Goku asked. "And, does it need to be so complicated, Vegeta? You're not exactly the easiest guy either, ya know."</p><p>"I don't like her," Vegeta sneered, locking the weights into place on the bar for Goku. He watched as Goku lifted the bar up and then slowly lowered it to his chest, and then began to spot him. "She's a typical rich snob, used to bossing everyone around. She thinks she can bend me to her will, just like her pathetic boyfriend."</p><p>"Yamcha's not pathetic," Goku breathed, chuckling a little.</p><p>"You lived in my apartment, I KNOW you must have heard them fucking and heard her faking orgasms with him. I haven't even lived there a month and I've heard it several times now," Vegeta challenged. At that, Goku said nothing, just grunted as he continued his bench press. Despite his silence, a red blush spread over his face that had nothing to do with his exercise. Vegeta snorted. "That's what I thought."</p><p>"Well, he makes her happy. Word through the grapevine is he's going to propose soon."</p><p>"I suppose I don't blame him," Vegeta muttered. "I saw him leave one day while I was coming back from work. That asshole is batting way out of his league. She's a 10 and he's average at best."</p><p>"<em>Oh</em>. I see," Goku said knowingly, looking up at the upside-down glare from Vegeta. "So you think Bulma's a 10, huh?" he asked with a grin, as though he had just figured out a massive secret.</p><p>This time, Vegeta's face reddened. "What? No!" he ferociously growled.</p><p>"You literally just said that she's a 10."</p><p>Vegeta was tempted to stop spotting Goku – let the bar fall and kill him, it would serve him right for being such a clown. "Well…" he awkwardly started, scowling. "She isn't <em>hard</em> to look at, I suppose, but her personality lowers her a few pegs. Who could stand a woman like that?"</p><p>Goku chuckled, which only made Vegeta want to murder him more. "Whatever you say. I will tell you that Bulma and Yamcha always been pretty rocky. Chi-Chi says it's boom or bust now. I'm not sure they'd survive another big fight, but if they do, they're going the distance."</p><p>"Why the hell are you telling me?" Vegeta snarled.</p><p>"Just thought you'd like to know where they stood."</p><p>"I don't give a shit."</p><p>"'kay."</p><p>"You got something to say to me?"</p><p>"Nope."</p><p>"I hate you."</p><p>Goku just grinned.</p><hr/><p>"Soooo, what are we doing Thursday night?" Bulma asked later that night. Her cell phone was balanced between her shoulder and her cheek, while she stirred up some concoction she had made in her slow cooker. She had lived for years off her mother's amazing cooking, and though she was hardly the next Gordon Ramsay, she at least knew enough in the kitchen to get by.</p><p>Bringing up the spoon for a taste, her nose crinkled in disgust, and she resisted gagging. Or maybe not. "How about we go out for dinner?" Bulma asked, frowning as she went to put the pot away. Looked like a pizza night after all.</p><p>"What's Thursday night?" Yamcha innocently asked on the other line. Bulma froze and remained silent, and he laughed, "I'm just kidding. Yes, we can do whatever you want B, it's your birthday."</p><p>She smiled, satisfied. "Damn right."</p><p>"The big 3-0!"</p><p>"Hey, it's not polite to talk about a woman's age."</p><p>"Alright babe, well I gotta let you go, I'm going out with some of the guys on the team tonight."</p><p>Bulma's smile vanished, her eyebrows drawing together. "I thought we were going to have a virtual date and stream some Netflix tonight?"</p><p>"Oh shoot, was that tonight?" Yamcha asked sheepishly. "Well we can do it tomorrow, right? I mean, we just saw each other yesterday and I'll be seeing you on Thursday."</p><p>Bulma sighed, disappointed. "Alright, then I guess I'll chat you later."</p><p>"Okay, love you."</p><p>"Love you too, bye."</p><p>Bulma hung up and muttered to herself, tossing her phone on the kitchen counter. Might as well throw out the pot of food, as it tasted like Crap, with a capital C. A fitting end to a shitty day, having her own boyfriend bail on her, and failing at making a simple dinner. She supposed though that it was nothing a delicious box of pizza and a tasty bottle of wine wouldn't cure, because fuck it, YOLO, #treatyourself and all that other self-care mumbo jumbo. After the awful day she'd had, from top to bottom, she deserved it.</p><p>Moments later, Bulma was descending downstairs, carrying the whole pot of what was supposed to be an award-winning liver stew recipe stuffed into a bag. So much for that. She would be leaving one hell of a review on that recipe tonight, that was for sure. She hadn't even bothered to empty the pot – she was going to throw it out, pot and all, because who cared? She could just buy another pot.</p><p>Soon she stepped out into the summer night, grateful for the dark which brought a respite to the blistering heat they were dealing with during the daytime. Bulma was wearing a terrible scowl as she went over to the dumpsters behind their building.</p><p>Her mood went from bad to worse, though, when she heard a familiar gruff voice speak from behind her, "What the hell is that <em>smell</em>? You throwing out something radioactive?"</p><p>Bulma shot a glare over her shoulder, locking eyes with her archnemesis. She exhaled angrily through her nose when she saw that Vegeta was in his running gear, with his black athletic shorts and his black compression socks that ran up his calves, a plastic water bottle in one hand. He was bare-chested and soaked in sweat, because of course he was. Some earphones were hanging from around his neck, and she forced herself to look away, lest she ogle the bastard.</p><p>"I thought I told you to never speak to me again," she reminded him peevishly. She then heaved the bag, complete with her pot containing her dinner disaster, right into the dumpster.</p><p>"Tch, fine by me," he breathed, still slightly out of breath from his running.</p><p>Then, to her complete horror, Vegeta threw his empty plastic water bottle into the dumpster too, instead of the recycle bin right next to it.</p><p>"What are you doing?!" Bulma shrieked, startling Vegeta who had been starting to turn away to head back inside.</p><p>"Huh?" he asked, bewildered. He looked around, as though maybe he had stepped in something that he shouldn't have.</p><p>"The recycle bin is RIGHT THERE!" Bulma yelled, pointing to the large blue dumpster next to the green one. "Don't you care about our planet?"</p><p>Vegeta scoffed, annoyed now. "Who gives a fuck? It all ends up in the same place."</p><p>"No it doesn't! That water bottle you threw is going to end up in a whale's throat!"</p><p>"Oh? And how does it help the environment to throw out whatever the hell you just threw out? Looked like an entire pot to me, one filled with shit, no doubt."</p><p>She glared at him, wanting to throw him in the dumpster instead. "What I throw out is none of your business. You ought to be a more considerate neighbor and do your part to save our planet!"</p><p>"Well, why don't you go get your boyfriend to go dumpster diving and get out my water bottle? I'm sure Mr. 4 out of 10 can handle <em>that</em>, right?" he sneered.</p><p>"You…" Bulma started, trying to maintain her footing in this argument, but goddamn it was hard to keep eye contact with him when his chest was glistening with his sweat. "I told you never to talk to me again!" she finally yelled.</p><p>"I'd love not to, but you keep pestering me!" Vegeta yelled back. "Is your boyfriend not satisfying enough that you have to come annoy me instead?"</p><p>"My boyfriend is none of your business!"</p><p>"You know, little rich girl, you might boss around everyone else in your life, but you better watch how you talk to me!"</p><p>"Oh? Is that a threat?"</p><p>Vegeta growled, "How about you stay the fuck out of my way, and I do the same for you?"</p><p>"Fine, just move your laundry time and then you won't see THIS gorgeous face anymore!" she yelled, tossing her loose blue curls over her shoulder, which drew his attention more than she realized.</p><p>"That's the only time that works with my work and workout schedule!"</p><p>"There's a laundromat two blocks away!"</p><p>"Oh, so I should go there and pay to do my laundry, even though it's free in my own building?!"</p><p>"I WILL PAY YOU TO GO OVER THERE SO I DON'T HAVE TO SEE YOU!"</p><p>"Hey guys!" Goku's voice nervously rang out, drawing the attention from both Bulma and Vegeta and ending their shouting match. He jogged over to them, also in running clothes, though at least <em>he</em> wore a tank top. With Vegeta distracted, Bulma gave him a quick and subtle look-over. Not like anything would ever, EVER happen between them, but she could appreciate male beauty when she saw it. Goku grinned as he came closer, resting his hands on his hips while he scanned Vegeta over. "You started without me, Vegeta? Thought we were training together tonight?"</p><p>"We are, I just had a warm up, that's all. Let's go," Vegeta ordered, sounding like a general on the battlefield. He stalked away without another word to either of them, going back further behind the building where there were running and biking trails. It was night, but the lighting was fantastic. Another reason he loved the apartment.</p><p>Goku slowly started after him, walking backwards so he could face Bulma as he gave her an apologetic shrug. "We're training for a triathlon," Goku explained sheepishly. "I'll catch up with you later!"</p><p>"Alright," Bulma grumbled, watching as he waved to her and turned around, running after Vegeta. She took a deep breath to calm down, muttered <em>good riddance </em>to her asshole neighbor, and then turned around as well to head back to her apartment.</p><p>After all, pizza and wine beckoned. That, and she suddenly had an important email she had to send to the apartment management…</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. The Mom Test</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><em> <strong>From: </strong> </em> <em>West City Oak Apartments</em></p><p><em> <strong>To: </strong> </em> <em>me</em></p><p><em> <strong>Subject: </strong> </em> <em>Friendly Community Reminders :)</em></p><p>
  <em>Dear cherished residents,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>We hope this email finds you well! We are reaching out to provide reminders of our community policies. Please review the below carefully!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>1) We strongly believe in recycling here at West City Oak Apartments. It has been brought to our attention that one resident was seen polluting our grounds with plastic water bottles. Please deposit any plastic water bottles into the appropriate recycle bins (or even better, invest in a metal water bottle that you can reuse!) Doing your part can help save the planet! :)</em>
</p><p>
  <em>2) The laundry rooms are meant to be shared with all tenants in each building. Please cooperate with your fellow neighbors, so that everyone may wash their clothes at the times they wish. When everyone's clothes are clean, everyone will get along better! :)</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Thank you for being a cherished resident in our wonderful community. Please reach out to us if you have any questions or concerns!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Kind regards,<br/>Your friendly neighborhood management team</em>
</p><p>Vegeta was grinding his teeth while he read over the email on his phone, his other hand loosely on his waist while he breathed heavily. He had paused halfway during his morning run to switch music playlists, and had been greeted with that shitty email instead. The smileys were annoying enough, but more annoying was that it MUST have been Bulma's doing. Although the email seemed to be sent to all of the residents, the contents were much too targeted to be a coincidence. Instead of fighting him with honor, she had straight up Karen'd him and gone to the management team.</p><p>He debated if it was worth a reply. Professional passive aggressive emails were his specialty after all, and this email was practically begging for it. However, he decided against it; doing so would be admitting guilt, and he refused to give Bulma an inch. He scowled and put his earbuds back in, fired up his playlist, then re-strapped his phone on his arm to resume his run.</p><p>If his jerk of a neighbor wanted to play these games with him, then he would play.</p><p>An hour later, Bulma was living her best life, dozing snugly under her blankets and pillows. Only some strands of blue were visible from the top of her head, as she was buried well and good. It was quiet and peaceful, her curtains were drawn, she was having a lovely dream where she had a lifetime supply of strawberries, and life was perfect.</p><p>And then, the loud heavy metal music suddenly began blasting from next door.</p><p>Startled, Bulma shrieked and promptly fell off the bed in a tangle of blankets, for the <em>second </em>time that week. Life wasn't perfect anymore, it was a fucking disaster now as she furiously pulled free from her web of blankets, glaring at the clock. It read 6:45am. It was criminal, <em>CRIMINAL </em>to play music at this ungodly hour<em>, </em>and for an insane moment she debated calling the police.</p><p>Forcing herself up, Bulma decided against it; giving an anonymous tip to her apartment management was one thing, but she would not be defeated by this man. She resisted the urge to grab a knife, lest she be tempted to stab the bastard (though he did deserve it, as she could hardly hear herself think from how loud his music was – and it wasn't even GOOD heavy metal!). She lamented the stupid decisions of the apartment complex – the units were sound-proofed floor to floor, so that no one had to listen to people walking above them. But the walls were paper thin <em>in</em> <em>between</em> the units on the same floor. Considering that she and Vegeta held the only two units on the third floor, no one else was tortured except her (of course).</p><p>Less than a minute later, Bulma was banging on his door like she wanted to knock it down entirely. "Vegeta!" she yelled furiously. She leaned her ear close to the door, but all she could hear was the obnoxious heavy metal. "VEGETA!" she screamed, banging harder. She kicked the door for good measure.</p><p>Inside his apartment, Vegeta was leisurely taking a shower. He could vaguely hear the banging on the door, but it wasn't louder than his music. He smirked and took his sweet time, in no rush to get out.</p><p>Bulma was wondering if she had grounds to sue this awful man for the emotional damage of costing her precious sleep, when the music finally, <em>mercifully, </em>stopped. Moments later, Vegeta opened the door.</p><p>"Good morning, how can I help you?" Vegeta greeted with fake sincerity dripping in his every word, a maddening smirk on his face. Bulma sucked in a breath when she saw that he was soaking wet from his shower, only a loose towel around his waist. He wasn't a blind man; he saw the way she admired his body, and thus his current choice of attire was on purpose. Anything to give him an edge in this psychological warfare she was trying to engage with him.</p><p>However, <em>because </em>he wasn't a blind man, he also couldn't help but notice HER choice of attire. Having literally rolled out of bed, Bulma was in short shorts and an obscenely snug tank top. What caught his immediate attention though was the <em>very obvious</em> fact that she wasn't wearing a bra.</p><p>"You are THE MOST inconsiderate jackass on this whole planet, blasting that god awful shit you call music so early in the morning! I'm going to-" Bulma paused when she saw his eyes roaming her chest. She gasped dramatically, hugging herself and covering her breasts as she screamed, "How DARE YOU ogle me, I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!"</p><p>His dark eyes immediately shot back up to hers, as he scoffed. "Woman, you make it sound like I walked into your bedroom while you were changing! You came to my door dressed like that!"</p><p>"Well you don't have to look! I'm a LADY!" she shrieked.</p><p>"Well why don't you go let the apartment management know about it?" he sneered.</p><p>"You know what? Fine!" Bulma yelled, lowering her arms and resting her hands on her hips. She purposely straightened her back to raise her breasts as high as possible, but Vegeta forced himself to maintain eye contact as she glared at him. "You can look, cause you're NEVER gonna touch anything as good as these babies!"</p><p>Vegeta exhaled roughly, and she could have sworn she saw a blush starting to creep on his face. Before she could tell for sure, he stepped back, slamming the door shut hard. Bulma kicked his door for good measure, shouting, "Jerk! See if I don't tell my boyfriend about-"</p><p>The heavy metal music started blasting again, drowning her out. Bulma took a deep breath to resist the urge to scream, before marching back into her apartment, slamming her own door shut too. She marched back to her bedroom, digging through her blankets like a madwoman until she finally found her cell phone. She snatched it up, cursing the world when Vegeta's heavy metal kept intruding on her thoughts. Maybe she could hire a hitman! No one would miss the jerk next door.</p><p>No, she decided, forcing herself to calm down. Goku. That's who she needed. She immediately began to text him, knowing he was an early bird and would be awake already.</p><p>
  <em>Your "friend" is blasting heavy metal right now, and it's barely 7 in the morning!</em>
</p><p>A few moments later, her phone began to ring, and she saw Goku's goofy profile picture flash on her phone. Unable to hear herself think, she muttered to herself and left her bedroom, heading to her balcony. Barefoot, she stepped out into the hot morning air, sliding the balcony door closed behind her – but leaving an inch of space. The door liked to jam hard enough that she could never reopen it without help, and she didn't want to risk getting locked out on her balcony with Yamcha nowhere in sight. But at least out there, she could actually have a conversation, the heavy metal muffled in the background.</p><p>"Hello, good morning," she greeted her best friend with a sigh.</p><p>"Hey Bulma, I'm getting ready now for work," Goku greeted, trying in vain to brush his wild hair in his bathroom while he had his friend on speaker. "What's going on?"</p><p>"I told you in the text! Vegeta is being a complete asshole, blasting his awful music, I had to come onto the balcony to talk to you!"</p><p>Goku just chuckled, making Bulma scowl in annoyance. "Might have to do with that email he got this morning."</p><p>"What email?"</p><p>"The one from the complex. He forwarded it to me…he had some strong words about it. That wasn't very neighborly of you, ya know."</p><p>Bulma flopped down into a lawn chair she had on her balcony, coming awfully close to pouting. "Well he isn't exactly being very nice to ME either, Goku!"</p><p>"Vegeta is…tough sometimes. He's a good guy though, once you get to know him!" Goku said cheerfully, trying to do his tie while he leaned in close to his mirror. "Both of you are pretty stubborn, the most stubborn friends I have. If you guys can get past that, maybe you can be friends too!"</p><p>His optimism was maddening sometimes. If they hadn't been best friends since childhood, she might have hated him for it. "Can't you just move back in with Chi-Chi?" Bulma pleaded. "Maybe Vegeta can swap with you guys?"</p><p>"Sorry, no can do! Anyway I gotta run – but I'll see ya for your birthday! And hang in there, things will get better!"</p><p>They exchanged their goodbyes, and Bulma sighed, sulking into her lawn chair. Goku had a way of challenging her to "rise above" and "be better" – a really annoying quality of his. Even if she DID want to start over with Vegeta, that would require her to back down and extend him an olive branch of some kind. Or worse…an <em>apology. </em>Backing down was not in her DNA; upon imagining Vegeta's smirk of triumph over knowing he had <em>won, </em>a severe frown came over her face. No, she refused to give the bastard the satisfaction – especially when she was sitting on her balcony to get away from the heavy metal he was blasting!</p><p>Her phone buzzed again, and she raised it to see that she had a text message from her mother. She went to swipe the notification away, when suddenly, an idea came to her.</p><p>And then, a grin spread over Bulma's face.</p><hr/><p>In hindsight, Bulma should have known there was a reason why Yamcha had dropped by unexpectedly that night. Sure, he was her boyfriend and she would have been pleased if he was over every single night, but his fame due to his baseball team kept him in social circles she wasn't interested in joining. After all, she was an heiress to the largest company on the planet – she did not need additional fame, although she could admit to herself that she always did look like a fucking rock star on TV. Upon realizing that she was not going to immediately step up at Capsule Corp, and that she was in fact more interested in building her name outside of the company (before she inevitably took it over), the media had moved on to more interesting and salacious topics. She knew the moment she called her father and said she was coming back, the media would be her enemy once again, but until then, keeping them at arm's distance was just fine. And so when Yamcha wanted to play the hero for his adoring baseball fans in front of the cameras, she was rarely seen with him.</p><p>So when he said he was going out that night with his team, and would see her the following day for her birthday, Bulma had taken him at face value. Thus she had been surprised when Yamcha had knocked on her door that evening. Her blue eyes sparkled as she smiled with content. Why <em>wouldn't </em>he just drop by to see her? A man had to show appreciation for his gorgeous girlfriend, especially when she was easily the most beautiful woman on the planet (she had the framed magazines for proof, having been named "sexiest woman alive" three years in a row; she was shooting for ten in a row, for that was what she deserved).</p><p>Yamcha sat heavily on her sofa, kicking his feet up on her coffee table. Bulma came in from the kitchen and gave him a glare, and he sheepishly lowered his feet. She handed him a beer bottle, and sat down next to him with her own.</p><p>"So how was work?" he ventured.</p><p>"Fine. I'm thinking I'll probably be running the place before the end of the year," Bulma mused out loud, before leaning back with her bottle.</p><p>"Excited for tomorrow?"</p><p>"Yup. I've got tomorrow and Friday off work, and Chi-Chi's already made the arrangements for the pub we're hitting once we're all off work, and then the club we're hitting afterwards. 6pm sharp, make sure you're there!" she exclaimed, eyes bright. Prior to going out with her friends, she was going to sleep in, have lunch with her parents, then relax in her underwear all day long and watch her favorite movies until it was time to go out that evening. It would be glorious.</p><p>Yamcha chuckled nervously, and suddenly, Bulma became suspicious. Before she could comment, he began, "So…about tomorrow…"</p><p>Her eyes narrowed dangerously, and he gulped. "Tomorrow, my 30th birthday? Yes, what about it?" she demanded.</p><p>"Um…well…"</p><p>Just then, there was a knock on the door. Bulma glared at him, telling him silently that this wasn't over, and then got up to go answer it. She smiled when she saw that it was her mom and opened the door.</p><p>"Hello dear!" Bunny greeted brightly, hugging her daughter with one arm. Her other arm was holding two boxes. "Now, the top box is for you, a pre-birthday treat! I have another for you tomorrow when you come over for lunch! Now then…where is your new neighbor friend?" she asked with a giggle.</p><p>Bulma grinned, taking the top box for herself. "He's right next door. You should go say hello!"</p><p>"Oh but of <em>course, </em>dear, we mustn't be rude!" Bunny tittered. She waved to Yamcha, "Hi, dear, good to see you!"</p><p>"Good to see you too!" Yamcha called out. Bulma then closed the door as Bunny walked over to Vegeta's apartment, and went back to take a seat next to her boyfriend. "What's that all about?" Yamcha whispered.</p><p>"Shh, just listen," Bulma whispered back. She was about to see if Goku was right about his opinion regarding Vegeta. She and her mother were thick as thieves; she had told her mother about all the problems she was having with her new neighbor, and then asked her to come and "assess" the situation. Bunny was a great judge of character, and had never failed Bulma in this regard.</p><p>Vegeta was loosening his tie with one hand after work while rummaging through his fridge with the other hand. He wanted something light, for he was going to change into his workout clothes soon and go for his evening run, his last run for a couple nights as he took some rest days.</p><p>He immediately got suspicious when someone knocked on his door, since he was not expecting anyone. He could hear that Bulma had company, and thus wasn't trying to be obnoxious with his heavy metal, unless she gave him a reason to be – which he was sure she would, annoying as she was. Vegeta scowled, closing his fridge door, then walked over to the main door leading to his apartment while he continued loosening his tie and unbuttoned the top few buttons of his shirt.</p><p>He checked the peep hole and frowned in confusion when he saw the blonde woman outside his door. She didn't live in the building, he knew that for sure. Muttering to himself, Vegeta opened the door, his frown worsening. He looked her over in mild disgust like she was there to convert him to Satan's church.</p><p>"Can I help you?" he gruffly demanded, his tone implying he had no desire to help with anything.</p><p>"Oh, why HELLO dear! Why, aren't you handsome! Oh my, those muscles, practically ripping through your shirt!" Bunny giggled, earning a bewildered look from Vegeta. "I'm Bulma's mother, and she told me about the new friend she's made who lives next door, and said I just had to come meet you! Oh, please step aside dear, there we go," Bunny said with a smile, nudging her way past Vegeta and into his apartment while he blinked with a dumbfounded look on his face. "I brought you cookies to welcome you to the neighborhood!" she called back, as she disappeared into his kitchen.</p><p>Distantly, he thought he heard laughing next door, and he scowled. Bringing in her mother was a devious move, and while Vegeta was well aware that he was an asshole (and he was damn proud of it), he was not such a foul shithead as to kick a mother out of his apartment – especially one bringing him cookies. Bulma had gambled correctly, and had gotten the upperhand once again, but it would not last long. Sighing in defeat, he closed the door and went over to the kitchen, only to see the blonde woman getting out food from his fridge.</p><p>"Would you like me to prepare you a dinner? You look famished!"</p><p>Vegeta blinked in surprise, but then shrugged and took a seat at the kitchen table. Might as well get something out of this.</p><p>Meanwhile, next door, Bulma was laughing while she leaned into Yamcha. He was grinning from her happiness, and also because she had for the moment forgotten their conversation before her mother's arrival.</p><p>But it wasn't for long. Finally, she sat up, chuckling as she got her beer. "Oh, I wish I could have seen his face," she laughed, picturing Vegeta dealing with her mother, before she chugged down the drink. Her blue eyes then shifted over, as though she suddenly realized her boyfriend was still there with her. She licked her lips a little, and then the amusement was replaced by suspicion. "So, you were saying?"</p><p>Yamcha sighed, and figured it was best to rip off the bandaid.</p><p>"So, there's this big exhibition game tomorrow in Angel City-"</p><p>"Are you going to miss my 30TH BIRTHDAY?!" Bulma shrieked.</p><p>"It's just, Manager Berry will be there and he's the biggest name in the game today, and so I can't pass up this opportunity because we are getting the chance to meet him face to face, I could get recruited for the best team in the league, but that means we gotta fly out tonight," Yamcha got out in one rushed breath, his desperation mounting as Bulma's anger visibly grew during his spiel. "Babe, this is a huge chance for my career! I'll make it up to you, I promise-"</p><p>"When? This weekend?" she challenged.</p><p>Yamcha winced. "Well, I'm not sure if we'll be back by this weekend, but when I do get back, I'll call you and I'll spend the whole day with you-"</p><p>"Get out."</p><p>"What? But I-"</p><p>"You knew I wanted to do something special for my 30th birthday, and now you come with this? I don't want to see you right now, so get out."</p><p>Yamcha looked deflated, but he stood up. He looked down at her, but Bulma was not standing with him, or even looking at him. Her calm voice in telling him to leave was scary. He gulped, but not wanting to anger her further, he simply walked towards the door.</p><p>He paused then, looking back sheepishly. "I am sorry, and I will make it up to you when I get back, I promise."</p><p>Bulma snorted and looked away towards her balcony, holding her head in one hand as she sat cross-legged on the sofa. Yamcha sighed, then left. Once he did, Bulma reached over for the box her mother had brought and opened it up. Inside was an assortment of cookies, and she took one chocolate chip cookie out. It was still warm, and so she gobbled it up. Nothing like chocolate to make her feel better, though she didn't know how she felt about Yamcha bailing. Disappointed? Not surprised? She grumbled and put Netflix on, sinking into her cushions.</p><p>An hour later, her mother came back into her apartment, positively buzzing. "Oh dear, that neighbor friend of yours, what a polite boy!"</p><p>"What?" Bulma asked in surprise. She was 99 percent sure that her mother was going to return saying that her neighbor was a total jackass, but she hadn't even realized how long Bunny had visited with him.</p><p>"Yes, quite a looker too," Bunny giggled, showing Bulma the empty box. "He ate all the cookies, and the dinner I made for him! What a healthy appetite that boy has."</p><p>"Great," Bulma sighed, rolling her eyes. "So he got a free dinner out of it."</p><p>"Where is Yamcha? Did he leave already?" Bunny asked as she sat down next to her daughter.</p><p>"Yep," Bulma muttered, emphasizing the final 'p'. "He's not even going to be around for my birthday, even though we had planned to do something for weeks. I don't even know when he'll be back." She paused, then admitted, "Sometimes, I wonder if it's worth it, or if we have outgrown each other."</p><p>Bunny nodded with understanding, patting Bulma's knee. "Well, dear, there is nothing wrong with exploring other options if Yamcha isn't making you happy. Life is too short!" she brightly said, before deviously adding, "Especially when you have such a handsome neighbor. It would be easy to date Vegeta too, with him living next door and all."</p><p>"VEGETA?!" Bulma cried out, then cursed under her breath when she remembered how thin the walls were. She snorted a mirthless laugh. "Me and Vegeta? Please. He's the worst neighbor EVER!" She then turned to the wall, her voice escalating, "You hear me? Worst neighbor <em>EVER</em>!" she shouted, hoping he heard.</p><p>On the other side of the wall, Vegeta smirked while he laced up his running shoes.</p><p>"No, no, dear – I spent good time with him, and I like him very much. You should give him another chance," Bunny whispered to her daughter, knowing how thin the walls were. "Maybe you two can be friends!"</p><p>Bulma looked deflated that Vegeta had passed the mom test. The mom test with Bunny had never – ever – failed her. Even when she'd first introduced Yamcha to her parents, her mother's reaction in private had been lukewarm, something that she wondered if she should have paid more attention to. Her mother had certainly not sounded as enthusiastic upon meeting Yamcha as she sounded now talking about Vegeta.</p><p>"I know Goku wishes we would be friends," Bulma admitted. "But I can't do it, Mom. That would be giving in, and he's been such a jerk to me!<em>"</em></p><p>Bunny just smiled. "Well, we will see what happens, all in good time."</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Swiping Right</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bulma's birthday began swimmingly; so well, in fact, that she almost forgot the fact that she wouldn't be seeing Yamcha that day. She was a little annoyed when he didn't immediately text her in the morning (he waited until <em>after </em>her lunch with her parents to send her a happy birthday text), but on the whole, she refused to allow him (or his absence) to ruin her day.</p><p>It was definitely a self-care, relaxing, lounging type of day. She had spent the afternoon in her pajamas, on her sofa, with ice cream and Netflix, and it was positively glorious. Even more was Vegeta not being an asshole that morning and blasting his heavy metal – she was fairly sure she would have murdered him and buried his body in the woods if he had ruined her birthday. NO ONE was allowed to do such a thing, and so she was relieved when the morning passed without incident.</p><p>Eventually, late afternoon came, and she began to get dressed to hit the pub with her friends. Moments like this, she was reminded of how gorgeous she was. "Sexiest woman alive" was fucking right, and she huffed a little with annoyance while putting on her lipstick as her thoughts unwittingly went to her boyfriend.</p><p>The disappointment in their relationship was mounting, and as she stared at her flawless reflection, she pondered why she even put up with it. Although she could admit to herself that she was spoiled and <strike>very</strike> a little high maintenance in some regards, that had never translated over to her relationship with Yamcha. She just wanted to spend time with him, and not have him blow her off, something which was happening with more and more frequency. They were high school sweethearts; his boyish and shy nature, along with his sweet gestures and mischievous smile, had solidly won her heart at 16.</p><p>But now they were adults entering their 30s, and it felt like they were drifting in different directions; she was a brilliant woman, but she had no idea how to pull them back together. It did not help that sometimes, she wondered if he cared more about his fame than about nurturing their relationship.</p><p>She took a breath and cleared her mind. It was her birthday, and she was heading out and it was going to be a great evening with her friends, which was all that mattered.</p><p>Moments later, Bulma opened the door and began heading downstairs, her head high as she began to buzz with excitement. However, it was short-lived; down below, she heard the main door to the building open, and then scowled when she recognized the gait of the footsteps climbing the stairs. Rounding the middle landing, she raised her head higher when Vegeta rounded the corner and started up the same flight of stairs, obviously coming home from work by his attire.</p><p>"Hello," Bulma said, with the same forced politeness she used with coworkers she couldn't stand. Though she was not prepared to concede anything to him, him passing the Mom Test and being in Goku's good graces made her at least <em>try </em>to be neutral. He did not deserve it, but she would try to rise above.</p><p>Despite her tone, her eyes roamed over his work outfit in appreciation. Vegeta was in a black suit with a crisp white shirt and blue tie, and damn, he must have used a tailor because it was fitted to him perfectly. Bonus points for him having loosened up the tie already…she growled a little to herself. <em>Focus, girl.</em></p><p>Vegeta had had his gaze down on his cell phone, but he immediately looked up when he heard her voice. She could not read the look on his face as he appeared to skim over her outfit, before his dark eyes shifted back to hers and he scowled.</p><p>"Going out without your broom tonight?" he sneered.</p><p>Well, no one could say she hadn't tried. Bulma's blue eyes flared with anger, before she faked a laugh. "Hilarious. At least I have friends to go see, which is more than I can say for you."</p><p>"We literally have a mutual friend."</p><p>"Goku would befriend you even if you'd committed genocide. He doesn't count."</p><p>Vegeta flashed an infuriating smirk. "Your mother seemed to like me."</p><p>She glared at him while they walked past each other, neither breaking their eye contact. "Why don't you move into another apartment? We were doing just fine until you moved in."</p><p>He snorted. "None of the other neighbors have a problem with me. Maybe the problem is <em>you, </em>and how much of a spoiled brat you are."</p><p>"Why don't you just shut up for once in your life?" she growled, finally breaking their eye contact as she marched faster down the stairs. "You're so RUDE!"</p><p>"Tch, you started this conversation!" he shot back, reaching the next landing. They both turned the corners, him continuing upstairs and her continuing downstairs, both muttering to themselves.</p><p>Bulma stepped outside, thankful that it was cooler now that it was dark out. She quickly put the exchange out of her mind, determined to have a great time. Great drinks and great friends beckoned, and none of that included her inconsiderate boyfriend or the jerk next door.</p><hr/><p>Later that night after midnight, Vegeta was still wide awake, sitting on a lounge chair out on his balcony. His balcony and Bulma's, side by side at about arm's length distance, both faced a wooded area with trails that were great for his runs. The soft lighting along the trails at night made for a peaceful sight, and he relished in the quiet.</p><p>Try as he might, Bulma's words were irritating him more than usual. He had always been a loner, and their little exchange had him itching for some kind of company that night. Thus, Vegeta found himself perusing Tinder on his cell phone, a beer in his other hand. It had been a solid 6 months since he'd gotten laid; he figured he was due.</p><p>Plus, bringing someone home for the evening would help rid the images from his mind of how <em>good</em> Bulma had looked coming down the stairs earlier. He was well aware that she was the current reigning "sexiest woman" something or another, but he still hadn't entirely been prepared for how gorgeous she looked that night: with her makeup freshly done, and the stylish way she'd pinned up her hair, and those clothes that fit her so snugly…she was a sight. Of course, he also recognized that his attraction was absolute insanity, and blamed it on the fact that he had not properly dated in a couple years now.</p><p>Goku had tried several months ago hooking him up on a blind date with some blonde chick that was cool as ice, so much that she may as well have been some kind of android. She was attractive he supposed, but conversation over dinner had been horribly stilted and awkward, and the vibe wasn't even good enough for a one night stand. She was clearly not interested in him, and the feeling was mutual. Thus Vegeta had concluded that Goku was a fucking awful wingman and that was the last time he'd allow the idiot to set him up on a blind date. Therefore, Tinder would have to do.</p><p><em>Swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe. </em>Vegeta scowled, as no one was catching his eye. He took a swig of his beer, unwilling to give up so easily. If timing as on his side, maybe he could even score a one night stand <em>and</em> get laid right when Bulma returned to her apartment, and force her to listen to HIM have sex for a change. She'd deserve it, for all the bullshit he had to hear between her and her boyfriend. Plus then she'd hear what good sex actually sounded like, he thought with a wicked grin.</p><p>Finally, he settled on a profile of someone who caught his eye. She was a brunette, posing on top of a mountain, athletic with a nice smile. A 27-year-old named Amber. Perfect. Vegeta swiped right, and a moment later, got an alert that she swiped right on him too. He smirked when she promptly messaged him, and then chugged the rest of his beer before messaging her back. They swapped a few messages, and a few more pictures, and then when she was convinced that he wasn't some psycho murderer, she agreed to come over.</p><p>He grinned wolfishly. The night was finally looking up.</p><p>Vegeta messaged her that he would leave the door to his apartment unlocked for her, and then went inside to get ready. A shower, a fresh shave, some cologne – and condoms, obviously. He frowned at the thought, wondering if he had any, and then decided it was best he go check to make sure. If not, he would have to make a quick run to the convenience store a few blocks away.</p><p>Luck was not on his side that night, and Vegeta cursed when he rummaged through his belongings and realized he had no condoms. No matter – it would not take him long to go buy some. Amber had said she would be about 40 minutes. Enough time to buy the condoms and shower, but he would probably have to pass on the shave. He only had a little stubble, so it was probably fine anyway. Vegeta quickly and haphazardly pulled on his shoes, snatched his keys, wallet, and phone, then left the apartment, not even bothering to lock the door. The neighborhood was safe, and he would not be gone long.</p><p>Moments after he left, Bulma pulled up to the front of the building in an Uber. It was well past midnight, and she was pretty drunk; all she wanted was a hot shower and then to crash in her nice warm bed. She got out of the car, humming as she rather clumsily and slowly made her way upstairs to her third floor apartment. The evening had been grand, filled with great food, strong drinks, and lots of laughs, and her heart was full. Well, mostly. She was a little upset that Yamcha hadn't been there, but not enough to ruin her evening. There had even been some dancing afterwards, which had been a total blast. Unfortunately, her friends hadn't taken the next day off work, so they had called it a night. Bulma figured the timing was probably good anyway – she had had enough to drink for the evening.</p><p>Maybe <em>too</em> much to drink, by her difficulty getting her apartment key into the keyhole, and by the wave of dizziness she was feeling. Bulma raised her eyebrows, blinking slowly, and then in frustration just tried the doorknob.</p><p>To her shock, the door opened. Had she left in such a hurry that she had forgotten to lock it? Well, no matter. She groaned a little as she entered the apartment – it felt like everything was in reverse, another sign that she had probably overdone it with the alcohol. The lights were off, and so she made her way to the bathroom, dropping her bag on the floor along with her keys while she yawned, kicking off her heels. She shrugged out of her jacket and let that drop as well, before peeling off her top. It got tangled up in her arms over her head, and she accidentally walked right into a wall, cursing. God but she really was disoriented, everything felt backwards! Finally, she managed to pull the top completely off, dropping it on the floor and leaving her in her bra as she disappeared into the bathroom.</p><p>A minute later, and Vegeta entered back into his apartment, closing the door behind him. He had bought a box of <em>bareskin ultra pleasure </em>condoms, and had even snagged a bottle of wine. He wasn't planning to start a relationship or anything, but that didn't mean they couldn't have a glass to relax before having fun.</p><p>Vegeta was pulling out his cell phone from his pocket to message his Tinder date and see what her ETA was, when he tripped and nearly broke his face against the wall. Bewildered, he looked down – the lights were off, but the blinds were open for his balcony which was letting some light in from the moon and stars, allowing him to see the purse he had snagged his foot on. Even more astonishing were the jacket, heels, and blouse all strewn in a path leading to the bathroom.</p><p>A grin spread over his face. It seemed that Amber had beaten him back and started the party without him. He could see the light underneath the bathroom door, and the female clothing items left no doubt. Chuckling, he put the wine on the kitchen counter and opened the box to grab a condom to put in the back pocket of his jeans. He then kicked off his shoes, and pulled his shirt off over his head, tossing it on the sofa. Finally, he pulled out two wine glasses and went about pouring them each a drink.</p><p>Bulma meanwhile was sitting on the toilet, her head in her hands as she regretted all of her life decisions that had led to this point. She realized with dismay that getting older meant that she probably could no longer drink as much as she could in her early 20s. The fun had been worth it, but boy, her hangover was going to be a killer.</p><p>Finally, she was at the sink, washing her hands and then splashing water on her face. It was only then that she realized there was what appeared to be a man's shaving kit spread out on the counter next to the sink. She squinted, confused, but then it suddenly dawned on that it must have been Yamcha's. Yes; if she listened, she could vaguely make out someone in the kitchen.</p><p>A huge smile spread over her face as she realized her boyfriend must have come over to surprise her! She flicked off the light and opened the door without giving it more examination (for if she had, she would have noticed that her makeup was nowhere to be seen, and that the toothbrush was not hers). Too excited over the prospect of seeing her boyfriend, and too drunk to pay attention to detail, she left the bathroom and went back out towards the living room, where there was a dim and rather romantic lighting turned on now.</p><p>As soon as Bulma entered the living room, now with lighting for her to see better, she blinked a few times as though trying to clear her vision. Even drunk as she was, she finally realized that though the apartment sort of looked like hers in flow and layout (except in reverse), none of the furniture or belongings seemed familiar at all. She looked down at the coffee table where there were two glasses of wine set, her eyebrows pulling together in confusion, when Vegeta came out of the kitchen into the living room.</p><p>"You beat me back," he was chuckling as he came into view. He was shirtless, his jeans hanging low, a sight that he was hoping would put his Tinder date in the right mood sooner rather than later. "You were earlier than I was ex…pecting…" Vegeta's voice trailed off, as he and Bulma made eye contact and stared at each other in shocked silence for several long moments, both of their eyes growing wide.</p><p>Finally, Bulma screamed, self-consciously covering up her chest. "Vegeta! What are <em>you </em>doing here?!" she shrieked.</p><p>Vegeta sputtered a little until he finally found his voice, "I LIVE here! What the hell are YOU doing here? Did you…" his eyes grew even wider, before fury washed over his features. "Did you fucking <em>catfish </em>me on Tinder?!" he yelled.</p><p>"WHAT?! How DARE you accuse me of <em>catfishing!</em>" Bulma yelled back, her anger making her forget about covering up her chest as she rested her hands on her hips. Vegeta's eyes followed the motion, taking in the sight of her in her snug black bra that hugged her breasts so perfectly; her chest was heaving with her growing rage, which had her skin flushed. In the dim lighting, he could not have looked away if he had tried. Fortunately, Bulma was too drunk to notice the way he was staring at her as she kept ranting, "Do you see how fucking gorgeous I am? I don't need to catfish anybody, EVER! Get out of my apartment!"</p><p>Vegeta's upper lip curled back in anger. "This is MY apartment, infernal wench! YOU get out!" Bulma hiccuped, and he saw the awareness dawn on her as she looked around the apartment again. Something about the way she was blinking, made him pause in realization, before he exhaled through his nose.</p><p>"Are you drunk? You are, aren't you?" he stated rather than asked, observing her more critically. He thought she was growing flushed from her anger, but it was clear now that he was paying attention that she was intoxicated.</p><p>"No!" Bulma scoffed, raising her head back. "I am perfectly fine!"</p><p>"Erm…is this Vegeta's apartment?"</p><p>Both Vegeta and Bulma turned to the brunette woman who had just come into the apartment. She was dressed nicely in a summer dress, a denim jacket on over that as her brunette curls were loose and framing her face. She was looking confused and uncomfortable as she looked from Vegeta to Bulma. Their states of undress led her to put 2 and 2 together, and she frowned.</p><p>"Amber," Vegeta said in a rushed breath, drawing Bulma's attention. She watched curiously as the features on Vegeta's face tightened as he immediately ignored her and went over to the woman who had just entered. For whatever reason, it made Bulma scowl as she huffed, making the assumption that it must have been a girlfriend. "This isn't what it looks like," Vegeta was saying, gesturing back to Bulma. "She's just my neighbor, and she was just leaving."</p><p>"Right…look, I'm not really interested in whatever's going on here, so I'm just going to go," Amber said, turning back towards the door.</p><p>"Good!" Bulma called out after her. "He's a jerk anyway! YOU CAN DO BETTER, GIRL!"</p><p>"I…" Vegeta started, but he didn't know what to say. He felt awkward pushing the issue with a woman he didn't really know. He just watched in disappointment as his Tinder date walked out the door, his shoulders falling as his hopes of getting laid vanished with the door closing. "Fuck," he muttered under his breath. Perhaps later he could message her and better explain the situation, once cooler heads prevailed. She was attractive, very much so.</p><p>Though not as much as the woman behind him. Vegeta turned back to his unwanted guest, scowling as he watched Bulma rather clumsily try to pick up her belongings off the floor. His nose twitched, and he went over to the sofa, grabbing his shirt and pulling it over his head.</p><p>"Thanks for the cockblock," he sneered, pulling his shirt down. He reached for one glass of wine, and damn near chugged all of it in one shot.</p><p>"Lock your door next time," Bulma shot back. She nearly yelped as she almost fell over, making him exhale angrily through his nose. "This wasn't how I wanted my birthday to end, so I don't wanna hear it!"</p><p>Vegeta lowered the now-empty wine glass, then snatched up the second one as he raised an eyebrow. "It's your birthday today?" he asked, before knocking back the entire second glass.</p><p>"What do you care?" she grumbled, trying to pick up her heels. She looked up in surprise when Vegeta picked one up for her, putting it in her arms with her jacket, shirt, and purse. Her lips pursed as they both scowled at each other.</p><p>"I don't."</p><p>"Of course not," she growled. "You're my archnemesis."</p><p>He snorted, breaking into something dangerously close to a smile. She must have been more drunk than she thought, because her stomach fluttered in some kind of way when his usually hard features eased in amusement.</p><p>"Archnemesis, huh?" Vegeta said with a maddening smirk. "You're not dramatic at all, are you? Anyway, if it was your birthday, then where is your loser boyfriend?"</p><p>"Yamcha isn't a loser, and it's none of your business!" she snapped at him. Raising her head, she walked past him towards the door as proudly as she could with her head held high.</p><p>Vegeta went past her and opened the door for her, stepping aside to let her walk out. That smirk that drove her up the wall was still on his face. "Well, I'm just of the mindset that you don't allow your woman to go to bed alone on her own birthday."</p><p>She resisted the urge to hit him with one of her heels. "I don't care what you think!" she loudly yelled, as she walked past him and left his apartment. Vegeta moved over so he was leaning with his back against the doorframe, watching her as she went back to the door leading to her own apartment. He put his hands in his pockets, waiting to make sure she got inside safely; he did not think she would survive if she tried going back down the stairs.</p><p>"I think I'm entitled to an opinion, seeing as you kept me from getting laid tonight," he idly commented.</p><p>It was then that Bulma noticed he was standing so he was half in, half out of his apartment, with his attention solely focused on her. She glared at him. "You can go back into your apartment now," she peevishly said.</p><p>"Tch." He smirked, crossing his arms over his chest. "I am already partially in my apartment. Besides. I can't have you tumble down the stairs because you're drunk. You could potentially die, and I'm the last person you've been seen with."</p><p>Bulma visibly pondered his words. She blinked a few times, then turned and tried to unlock her door once again with her key. She cursed under her breath, struggling with the task, before she finally looked back at him curiously. Something about her gaze struck him, and he raised an eyebrow.</p><p>"You want me…to be safe," she stated, studying him with much more clarity than he would have expected from someone who was intoxicated. Vegeta's amused smirk vanished, and he looked almost uncomfortable, not entirely knowing what to say. Bulma turned back to her door and finally managed to get it open, though she briefly hesitated before going in. "Ya know… you're still my archnemesis. But maybe you're not a <em>total</em> asshole. Maybe you're more like…80% an asshole."</p><p>"Tch." He then smiled, and something heated spread through her at the sight. If she thought he was handsome when he was serious, the way his smile lit up his face made him the most attractive man she'd ever seen. Bulma cursed herself inwardly, feeling her face heat up as she blamed her insane attraction entirely on the alcohol, for her thoughts were absolutely ludicrous; <em>she had a boyfriend! </em>"I'd say it's more like 85% myself, but I appreciate it nonetheless," he added in amusement.</p><p>Bulma blinked, before her nose crinkled up at his words, her whole face looking like she was smelling a carcass. Without another word, she rather quickly went inside her apartment, kicking the door shut behind her.</p><p>Once he heard the door lock, Vegeta went back into his own apartment, running a hand up through his hair in mild bewilderment. He was rather enjoying the banter…her fire challenged and amused him, perhaps a little too much. It would not do. They did not click, and even if they did somehow, she was taken.</p><p>Trying to take his mind off the whole ordeal – and off his very attractive neighbor – Vegeta snagged the bottle of wine and sat down on his sofa. Taking out his cell phone, he pulled up Tinder again, and began composing an apology for Amber.</p>
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